Yeah, this former NBA player is actually an INFAMOUS former NBA player. Like so infamous that he has a documentary about him. Like so infamous that I don't want to say much more about him, because I could identify him!
Here's how it all went down. The other day I had a minor league basketball team on my flight. And I remember noticing this guy amongst the young, vibrant teammates as standing out. My reaction was actual disgust, yup, disgust, there was something about him that caught my attention in a negative way. But he was very nice.
Well today he was on my flight again. He asked me if I was on the flight the other day, and once he said that I remembered him. I chatted with him a moment and he told me he was the coach of the team that was on the flight, and gave me his card in case I was in his city on a layover and wanted to see a game.
I finished my beverage service and sat in the back of the plane writing the previous post. After awhile he came and sat across from me, and asked for a beer. I chatted with him, asked him questions about his life. He said very inspirational things, the words coming out of his mouth were very balanced, but his eyes, his eyes were half shut, so tired looking, it was like he was half asleep.
I guess I knew he would hit on me, but I guess I also wanted that, to be hit on, by anyone. I don't remember how dating came up, but he said something like "do you prefer older guys or younger guys?" to which I responded "I don't like any guys" and proceeded to tell him about valentines day. He said "Alot of women like older guys, because women are so much more mature than men" (this guy is like, 50.) I thought that was funny and I said "It is interesting for me to hear you discuss dating, because I would love to hear the perspective of a former NBA player, I mean you guys have like the worst record when it comes to women" he said "what about football players, or hockey players" so I said "fine, athletes in general" He of course said I was stereotyping, and of course I learned after googling his name that he was married during 2003, so he is probably married now.
After he went back to his seat he asked me for my number. I was happy to give it to him. I think it would be very cool to know a basketball coach. I wrote on the napkin "remember, I am a man hater" and when he asked about that I said "I don't like men, so this is 100% a friendship thing only" and then he said he didn't believe me, I said "I don't hate men 100%, I think men are worthy of friendship, but thats it" and he said (ewww) "well everybody gets lonely" and I said "yes, I do, but I can still live without men"
It's really kind of silly. Why else would he want to talk to me if not for sex. I know this fact and yet I carry on like he would actually want a platonic friendship. I guess the reason is I am curious. Curious and facinated. My roommate got on my nerves a little tonight because I looked him up a second time and she said "your still looking at that guy" and I'm like "yeah! wouldn't you?" she said she was "completely unimpressed." Unimpressed? Who said anything about impressed? Intrigued, hell yeah. But also, I think it is a little annoying to act like it's not a big deal. You don't get to meet people who were in the news every day, so even if they arent a figure one would want to emulate, that doesn't make them any less interesting, hell, it makes them MORE interesting!
I just saw the movie "Factory Girl" tonight. First off, I am totally inspired. Watching it made me want to be the old me, and helped me recognize that I am not depressed anymore, that I am the old me now, I am just not expressing it. I am very inspired to be FAB. U. LOUS.
I also got all religious about my experience today. I thought (oh god, now I am embarrassed to even recount it) that maybe god put me in this man's path so I could point out that he shouldn't use drugs (yes these were my actual thoughts) I thought that I have a way of touching people, and that he is probably used to getting used, and maybe doesn't have anybody. It really is sad that he probably uses drugs (he does drink, for sure) because he is very kind.
But now I am feeling SOOO dumb, because HELLO! Drug users are just that. USERS. I lived with a cokehead as a roommate once, and of course, an alcoholic, my dad. A friendly suggestion that "you are too special of a person to hurt yourself with those bad drugs" has never worked. I, my friends, am star-struck stupid. Oh geez.
It's that, but also, I love having an interesting life. I love having stories about the interesting (in so many ways) people I have met. To get to say you chatted on the phone with a person who was in the news, that's interesting to me. Maybe that says bad things about me. I'm not sure. I don't think I am doing him any harm, I guess except the fact that I am facinated, so in a way am entertained by his personal downfall. But in my defense I nievely fantasized about being the voice of reason that would inspire him to take care of himself BWAH HA HA HA HA! I am sorry! I just have to laugh at myself. Sometimes my mind is like a made for TV movie.
What a life I lead.
An afterthought: You know what. I did connect with this guy today. Our conversation was meaningful, and he really did inspire me (as any good coach would.) I don't think that my fantasy of helping him was that off base. I think having a person genuinely say "how are things going?" can be meaningful to anyone. We all want someone to care.