I spoke to Ashram a few minutes ago. He was "giving me advice to help me in the future" that I shouldn't have kicked him when he was down by saying I just wanted to be friends when he just quit his job etc. In his opinion I should have told him I had a migrane if he wanted to kiss, and then tell him later.
A couple of things...the whole "tell him I have a migrane" wouldn't work. I did not want to kiss the last time I saw him, and he kept kissing me. I told him "I am tired and stressed about the training tomorrow" and he persisted. So I went down on him, did not enjoy it, and he finally left me alone. I was certianly not doing that again, so I told him two days later that I wanted to be friends.
Fortunately I am solid enough in my thinking, and confident enough to say "I have done nothing wrong" and believe it. This is what I am talking about when I say I could have been scammed by a cult or get in an abusive relationship. I could have taken him at his word, and truly believed I was a mean person for breaking it off when I did. Only two years ago I would have been believeing that.
Poor Ashram. He has had one girlfriend ever and is just so innocent of all of this. If relationships arent complex enough, try it interculturally and then add a lack of experience to it. It is like we are from completely different planets. I am so glad that I am confident in my choices, and cant be told that I have done something horrible.