Friday, January 12, 2007

Burn out

The picture of my eye below shows more than my dialated pupils, it shows unkempt eyebrows, acne, dark undereye area and puffy bags- I'm worn out!

I worked six consecutive days, did laundry, went on a date, went to a psychiatrist's appointment, broke up with my boyfriend, went to an eye appointment, and hung out with my old roommate Emma, and I have to go back to work the day after tomorrow.

I really wanted to clean my room. It takes time for me to get into it. Now I have promised my sister Linda (who just got ENGAGED at the Bellagio by the way) that I will go to some landscaping expo with her tomorrow. I just want to stop moving, I want to stop speaking to people. I just broke up with Charles! Oh my god!

I have been not-depressed before, and how did I get back to being depressed? I burnt myelf out. I am scared that that is where I am going. But I have to be there for Linda, there is a 30% or more chance she might choose me as maid of honor. I have to show her I wont let her down. I can't let her down tomorrow...can I?

I think I should stop fretting and just go to sleep. I think the fact that I fell asleep at 1:30 last night and got up at 7:30 in addition to two consecutive days drinking and OH YEAH the fact that I just broke up with my boyfriend, could all have to do with my feeling worn out. I have had a busy week!

5 comments:

QueenieCarly said...

I love that you're angling for maid of honor status. That's hysterical, although I can imagine...

Take it easy! You've exhausted me just reading all you've been doing!

Dream Writer said...

We have to take time to take care of ourselves...I have known this for a very long time and at times, I cannot practice what I preach!

I, too do a lot for family and friends and I exhaust myself and never do for me..

Stop and smell the roses..you are worth it to take time out for yourself, to take care of yourself, and to stay away sometimes from people...

I totally understand!! I am going through this right now as we speak:)

Diana Crabtree said...

Thats funny Carly. I'm not exactly vying for the position. With my depression and anxiety I have a history of being sortof flaky, so I want to put her at ease if it is me she chooses.

DW, I am glad your doc had a solution for you, I hope it works.

I appreciate the enocuragement to ease up from both of you

Lavender said...

sleep, oh wonderful sleep! take a benedryl or two... lol

Diana Crabtree said...

I don't think I will need it LD!