I have fallen back into my old patterns. My self-esteem and energy from my trip have been sucked away by being in my house. I wonder if I hired a housekeeper just one time if it would help change the way this place feels.
I am going on a date with the man who asked me out before my online date in early may. He seems nice, smart, and very flattering. Unfortunately he is Pakistani. Racist? Xenophobic? maybe, or maybe just gunshy. I just want to be with someone who is playing with the same set of rules as I am. What happened with Charles was just the worst. Any American would know better than to do that, they also would work harder to satisfy me in bed. I am so fearful of being hurt again, in fact, I am not looking for love, I am looking for companionship.
He should be here around now. I will publish the post and check that I have everything. I just heard a car door shut. Caio