Wednesday, June 15, 2005

If you are drunk and feel like commiting vandalism, please spraypaint a building or something, please don't hang from a fucking tree and kill it

I am pissed. While I was walking to the drugstore tonight some drunk asshole killed a tree. Mischief can be cute, but killing a tree? Come on. Otherwise it was a pretty good night. Myself, my sister Linda, and her boyfriend Tony went to a play. It was a preview, and I got comp tickets because of the museum (woo hoo!) The play was fun.

I got all hot and bothered at the beginning, the main character was so sexy. Now don't think I am some sort of nympho, it was his character, and the scenario. The play is centered around a sexy young guy who uses his hot-stuff bod to get through in life. Maybe him and the female character had genuine chemistry, or else they were very good actors, because I felt that tension you get when the chemistry is really strong. That scene made me very motivated to go to the gym!

First thing when I got home I rented a movie this hot actor was in, I can't wait to see it but I will wait until tomorrow because it is long and I imagine it will make me cry. (also I bet his character will be gay. I think that is hot, but I wan't to imagine him straight...just for tonight ;) )

The SEXY character comes to rent a room from a widow. He flirts and shakes it and gets her all excited, and she ends up fawning over him while he lives there. In the play they fuck, but this still reminded me of an old roommate. Well he wasn't even a roommate, he was a cokehead who slept in my roommate's room.

I will call him Nathan Toddson. He was a spoiled fucking rotten trust fund baby. His parents got him an internship at the pentagon and this little fucker blew it, just like he blew everything (literaly, he was a cokehead) He dated my roommate and cheated on her with the saddest girl ever (she felt sad about scars from a breast reduction, because it meant she could never be a stripper) and I know she had some drug addiction but I forgot what.

He claimed to have quit drugs and needed a place to stay to get back on his feet. He had been kicked out of the last two places he had stayed, one because he tried to commit suicide by OD'ing, the other because the girl he was staying with (and I am sure was fucking) got jealous and possesive of him. All of these characters involved worked at the Steakhouse with me.

My roommate Jennifer had quit HEROIN, seriously, she had! And so I think she had a big heart about it. I was okay with it because it meant it would lower my rent. And I too had a big heart about it. Everyone had a big heart when it came to this guy, he was just so georgeous. Beautiful. Absolutely Hot. He had the ability to tug on my heartstrings, he talked about his feelings and his depression, and anyone who reads my blog can guess how much I wanted to encourage him, especially since I still had suicide as a plan b at the time.

I was really attracted to him, he seemed attracted to me, but I was 210 pounds at the time, so I wonder if he, like the character in the play, just knew how to make a person feel sexy. I know if I had let it something could happen, but I wouldn't, EVER, okay, I would if no-one I knew knew him, but otherwise I wouldn't EVER! He kissed me on the back of the neck once, when he was drunk. I just laughed and said get the fuck off me shoving him away, but someone that georgeous, no matter how sleazy and loserish they are, is really hard to not desire.

That fucker disrespected our house so much. He used my pencil holder as an ashtray, he snuck into my bathroom and took all of my metabolife pills (I used it as speed once when moving) and worst of all (I still am mad about this) he taped PORN over irreplaceable broadway shows that NYNDM gave me! Those were reason enough to kick him out, but he was manipulative and pretty sad. One night he had people over and was smoking weed in the apartment. We had a security guard who walked the halls, for the love of god when you are staying at someones house to quit drugs, please keep your drug use outside. I told him that night to be out by noon the next day, when he left for work in the morning without his stuff I put it on the patio. When he got back I wouldn't even let him in to talk about it. It felt really good. Both my roommate and I had wished we had done it sooner. The play ends differently than the Nathan Toddson story does, the landlady sister and her brother decide to share him, they take turns getting to fuck him for 6 months each.

Before the play we went to a resturaunt and I lost my virginity again!
IAteBisonI ate Bison!

The waiter was cute, and he acted like he liked me. :) I told Linda not to give him too big of a tip, I didn't want to encourage playing with girl's hearts for money. I am never going back to that resturaunt, I never want to see him again. I am going to pretend that he thought I was great and is kicking himself for not running after me and giving me a flower (like they did in those impulse commercials in the 80's) I love you tootsie (his name) I am sorry we can't be together, you had your window, you blew it.

mood: like going to the gym


OG said...

whats the name of the play? i wanna see it and get all hot and bothered too!!!
that toddson fellow was a really shady character. and im glad u pu his stuff out on the patio., i think u should have aimed for the sidewalk but the patio is fine i guess.
ps: its tootsie's (is that really his name?!) loss. give me his number so i can be a friend why he weeps about letting u get away =)

Diana Crabtree said...

The play was called Entertaining Mr. Sloane. If you watch it you won't just get hot and bothered, you will probably get sick to your stomach too (it is in alot of ways about the ugly side of people- it also shows the beautiful backside of people, of the hot central character!) If you see it, I hope you enjoy imagining people like that, I hope you never have to actually meet one. (like toddson)

The waiter's name was tootsie. Thats what it said on the reciept. I asked him "Is your name really Tootie?" and he said "well, it's Tootsie" tee hee hee we're in love. (I think it was a pretend name)

Satan said...

Graffiti is much more fun.