Today I felt...NOT DEPRESSED!
Oh lord almighty THANK YOU lord almighty! It wasn't a particularly good day, but I wasn't depressed today!
Unhappiness can seem like such a burden unless you put it in context next to the serious stuff. Maybe what I needed was a month or so of mild depression and then a week or two of the juicy moderate stuff to make me appreciate non-depression again. I will take a lifetime of being unhappy much of the time, as long as I don't have to feel that horrible weight of being depressed.
I hope that tomorrow can be as good. I will do what I did last night, I went to sleep listening to the Dalai Lama's "Art of Happiness" book on tape instead of BBC world service (world poverty, war, the leader of my beloved country doing his best to destroy it and the rest of the world.) I think a message of hope before bed might be a bit more soothing.
I slept with an electric heat pad. A fire hazard? Sure, but it relaxed my muscles and I slept nice.
I woke up at 5:30. For some reason getting up early makes me happy, that doesn't mean I can get myself up on my days off of course. And I drank plenty of coffee.
I didn't eat too much today, missed breakfast (oops) but had a nice big black bean burrito for lunch. It's funny but I am not hugely hungry today, even though I didn't eat alot. Nice.
I am going to try to do all of that tomorrow. I will go to sleep with the heat pad and book on tape. I will try to get up earlier than 11, and I will have breakfast, but a healthy one with a nice homemade latte. I will also drink a lot of water and use my SAD light (grey winter weather is shown to contribute to depression)
I don't care today that I have a stupid disorder. I care that I was blessed with a day free from it!
mood: OK, I guess. JUST KIDDING! I feel not depressed! WHOOPIE!