Not Ready

I don’t hate the idea of massage school. I am already good at massage, and it would give me the ability to comfort, even help heal people! But I don’t like the circumstances. I don’t like the feeling of pressure, the “your life will end if you don’t” feeling.

The airline sent out some memos. For flight attendants there are voluntary leaves and for pilots voluntary furloughs, after that it will be involuntary furloughs. They are “waiting for mainline’s decision about travel benifits” I hope for the best, but with this company I expect worse than worse.

I realize I have not had enough sleep, I am probably overreacting to the time-frame, I am just so mad! I wanted to move on voluntarily, to be ready. I wanted to go to school while flying. I need an active job while in school or else I will gain weight. I am so frustrated and disappointed. I am not ready yet!

And it sucks to know that things will probably get worse at my airline, that is saying alot. Working for this airline is really hard- how could it possibly get harder?

This post is going nowhere. I am too tired to think straight, I think I should just think of something else.

mood: Sore-eyed exausted.