I just got back from a psychiatrist appointment. I showed the doctor the fog post, to show that even with my depression improved the anxiety is severe enough that I am only able to survive, and survival alone is not motivation enough for me to keep on going.
He initialy began suggesting a benzodiazapine, since I had such success on ativan, but my job drug tests for benzodiazapines, as they do shorten your reaction time, so those are out. I am terrified of addiction, so I am not TOO upset about not having that option.
He had two other ideas, one a blood pressure medication, another an anti-psychotic medication. I told him to skip the anti-psychotic because I have no problem with reading peoples minds. I didn't really say that. He told me that this medication had been studied in doses of 10 and 16 mg, for psychotic situatuations, but in doses of .25 and .50 it has worked very well for people with anxiety. I chose the anti-psychotic called Risperdal (Risperdone) becuase it had less side effects than the blood pressure medicine. A bonus is to hear it has effects in only a few days!
My hopes are up.
mood: optimistic
122 comments:
The sad thing is, with an antipsychotic, I may no longer recieve "messages" from baby bunnies and Satan
Reminds of that film 'Drop dead fred'. The more medication you take the more I disappear? I feel myself growing fainter alrea...........
Your disappearing? You can't be serious!
Are you disappearing because of the medication, or because I haven't seen either of those movies?
Oh no...no response, it's working too well
I don't need you anyway! I have the 7 dwarfs who live in my desk drawer who sing songs to me and do the macerena when I am trying to sleep
Isn't that right guys? Guys? Where are you? (brb- checking my desk drawer)
We don't like you, you killed Satan - You bitch!
This reminds me of a sad story. I met a SEXY guy at a dance club, he was weird, but it was a weird club.
He said he was a pagan priest of some kind and could legally perform weddings. He thought he could read auras and that he was able to tell if someone was sick (I happened to have a sinus infection at the time, which he couldn't detect)
I think I knew him for a month or so, he had told me that he was schitzophrenic and wouldn't take medication because his "spirit guides" would leave him. It was very sad.
The good news is I was able to blow him off guilt-free. He would hit on me and then 5 minutes later hit on another girl, right in front of me. Those spirit guides gave him very bad woman advice
.........atch drop dead fred and you'll understa........
Is it worth watching? Or are you being evil?
........ids movie, fun and touching. I think you'd like i........
What do I need to do to get Satan back?
I know what I'll do! I will throw something recycleable in the trash! To the landfill for you pop can!
...se your imagination, all you have to do is belie........
I can't believe you want me to watch that. Those actors are such Yahoos. And so serious
I believe in Satan! Get in front of me Satan!
*Satan tap-dances through Diana's blog*
What? Rick Mayall (sp?) and Phoebe Cates are awesome. Contains lots of adult themes and is really charming. What's wrong with kids films?
*Continues on past shaking head*
I thought there was an actor named Yahoo Serious
Maybe that was one of those Einstien movies
I love your cane and top-hat
Lot's of girl's love my 'Cane'. *wink*
There is an aussie actor named Yahoo Serious - Didn't know he was in Drop Dead Fred though. That guy is an idiot - really wasted an opportunity to build a career by making poor script choices.
Sorry- it was the big hair
I don't understand, what?
The big hair made me think it was yahoo serious, but then I googled his name and saw it wasn't him
I was wondering why you werent taking the jokes I was setting up for you
Drop Dead Fred. I think the 4.6 rating is a little harsh.
My aunt had dyed her hair too red and my cousin and I called her drop dead fred for a few days
Ahhhhhhhhh light dawns....
So you have seen the movie?
Is Light Dawns the name of the Actor who played Drop Dead Fred?
No, I havent seen the movie
I think I might (after I am done with the holy grail) then I may catch more of your references
I am in the mood for comedies lately
Then how did you know your aunt was Drop Dead Fred?
Light Dawns - Actor - That is a truely terrible joke. Truely terrible...
you may be in the mood for comedies but one more joke like that and I'll stop laughing with you and start laughing at you.
I knew it was her from the commercials.
Come now, we were just discussing an actor named Yahoo Serious, it wasn't THAT bad
My references are so obscure that I don't think anyone gets them...
Which is a nice way of saying I'm an unitelligble fool.
Funny how I mis-typed unintelligible...
I catch some of your references. But don't worry, you will always be an unintelligable fool to me.
No it wasn't THAT bad : )
Awwwwww, aren't you nice.
You mistyped it too.
I know I did, I was just in the middle of saying "I never mistype/misspeell things"
;)
Hehehe - Sounds like a beauty contest run at an Orchid: The winner of the 2005 Miss Peell competition goes to Diana Crabtree.
Should have put a drum rool in there somewhere...
LOL (except I dont understand the "Orchid" part)
Bad spellers of the world untie!
Im an okay speller, just a bad typ er
Hows work? My Satanic telepathy says busy
Then again, I did take an anti-psychic medication today
Peel as in peel a piece of fruit hence orchid (I misspelt orchad Haha).
I'm also terrible typer... sorta, actually I'm a terrible proof reader...
Works busy, but I have a killer headache from the sinus/ middle ear infection
I knew that- because I could read your aura
actually a bunny told me
Wow, you can read Aura's; Can you give me some bad advice on women and then marry me?
That damn wabbit!
*Diana begins an interprative dance*
Orchad is the code word my hypnotherapist uses
Do you want me to marry you to someone else or to me?
My advice would be marry me.
Shit! there I go again I meant Orchard.... blimey!
Is that the hypnotherapist on the cornice of 3rd and Devonshire Streets
We're already engaged aren't we?
Oh yeah, in 2055 :) I can't wait (although that's a long time for me to wait to lose my virginity)
Bahahhaaaahhahahhahhhaaa, yeah right! Lose your virginity... good one ;)
No, my other hypnotherapist works there and "cornice" is her code word...uh oh
*Diana begins spastic gyrations as she performs two interprative dances at one time*
Are you saying you don't plan to put out on our honeymoon?
See! There's no way I'd believe a girl who can gyrate like that is a virgin.
We might be too old.... we'd break a hip or something.
Maybe THIS will change your mind
*Flails her body around like a fish out of water*
That's just turning me on... maybe you shouldn't be wearing that mermaid outfit...
I mean you should be wearing something more appropriate not that you should be naked... or do I?
Turning you on is the idea.
Yes, I think it's a good idea that you put on the mermaid outfit. or else that cactus I like so much on you
I thought it was 'in' me not 'on' me! OUCH - I'm suddenly losing interest for some reason.
If you want to turn me on the switch is just to the left a little.
I will use that advice in 50 years
I hope things do improve for you.
Wait- you will be my 3rd husband by that time so I wont be a virgin anymore-
will you still have me?
Of course I will... Just don't make me angry!
Hey I think your first husband just dropped by. Nice Avator, Hehehe
Avatar - God damn it and my inability to spell and type!!!!!
ROTFLMAO! I forgot he said that LMAO
Whats an Avatar?
An image representing a user in a
multi-user virtual reality. Good word huh! Specifically online. I love new usage of words... not as much as I love you in a mermaids outfit. I think it was traditionally used in terms of a manifestation of hindu god.
The avatar not the mermaid outfit, now I'm having trouble with grammer.
It's cause your sick, don't sweat it
Yes, yes I am sick. But only mentally... can I have some of your anti-psychic medicine.
You can have all of it, I miss my 7 dwarfs ;)
Thanks to you I am number one on blogger's most recently updated blogs :) :) :)
Woo-hoo: You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1, You're no. 1.
The seven dwarfs don't like you anyway... or so I hear.
Thats a bad sign when your hallucinations dont even like you
I just thought that was normal - Uh oh....
Talking of normal... back in ten...
I am going to finish a movie "The Grudge" and maybe turn in.
I might check back later tonight- if your up to it
Oh, I'm always 'up to it'... *snigger*
Satan, your sick when your sick
I apoligise... it was all that gyrating coinciding with the spinning in my feverish head. I forgot where I was for a moment, but I remember now. I'm in Fiji.
If you were here I would bring you water and chicken soup.
If I was there I would be laying on the beach, reapplying my sunscreen (the Fiji sun can be harsh)
It's winter in the southern hemisphere...
Okay Okay I would bring you soup if I was there too
Mmmm soup
Is this enough? If not I'll get you more...as much as it takes
Actually I'm usually the type of person who just wants to be left alone when they're sick. People fussing around just makes me anxious and annoyed.
Sitting under a blanket on the couch, watching a DVD, and feeling sorry for myself is just fine.
I could take a bath in that... luxurious...
Than good thing I am on another hemisphere- when someone is sick I turn into Granny sweetness
I used the word 'just' a lot. I just wondered why?
I just dont know
You're all sweetness anyway and the car lot comercial shows just how granny you aren't. ; )
I am going to go to bed soon I think, not because I am tired out from a long day, limeted caffine and an unhealthy diet, but becuase you like to be left alone when you are sick
I just got called George Burns on my blog (did you hate my post BTW) is that a compliment?
I think e-fussing is just fine. I can't do any work anyway, I'm just wondering when they're going to fire me?
It could be a compliment.
I think you should go home sick if you can't do any work
I've got to travel to Canberra tonight. Can't go home...
Does that mean you did hate my post... I didn't think it was your cuppa.
What is Canberra?
Ummm, the Australian Capital. Whew! I knew Americans were bad at things outside their own country but really!
It's an aboriginal word meaning 'Meeting place'.
I thought you were referring that to the person who called you George Burns
No, I didn't hate your post. Why don't you think its my "cuppa"?
Is that why you didn't call in sick today?
Not exactly PC. ; )
Yeah, I soooooo wanted to stay in bed. (Mostly 'cause I was hoping you'd bring me soup. Hehehe)
The aboriginals pronounce it.
Cuunburra (and they say it really fast... now they have a cool accent)
The post or the comments? I am a little easier on the PCness when it comes to Majorities
I am getting terribly tired (maybe sympathetically)
I hope you get better, I am glad I am not there because it would take everything in my power not to dote on you
I meant the post. The christian right are a majority there aren't they, I forgot...
meeynma blak fullas ar gettin tigedda foray cooroberee
You should go to bed. Thanks for the chats mate. It was fun.
Goodnight
Night
Sorry it wasnt as fun as the coffee chat :)
Night, enjoy gettin tigedda
- enough of a majority to elect a "born again" as president
Yeah, that's all it takes.
You sleep well. And I will enjoy gettin tigedda widda Cuunburra boys.
PS. I thought you said that you were being serious, not funny, during the coffee chat.
I am making a joke to cover my true feelings
are those the feelings you get when you wear the Mermaid outfit...
No, the ones I get when you wear the mermaid outfit (with glitter in your hair extensions)
LMAO - You should go to bed, now there's an image that'll haunt you all night...
If "haunt" is what you want to call it
Hee hee, geez IM sick when your sick
Sweet dreams
Hehehe - Go to BED! *wink*
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