Don’t worry, I will spare you the gruesome details!!!

Current mood:relieved

I am not sure why I feel compelled to share this on my myspace, my guess is if I tell as many people as possible, I will be held accountable.

The last few months have been scary for me. My chest has been tight, and I have had problems breathing. I noticed it first in November, and it has gotten much worse this last month. These problems correlate directly to a 15-20 pound weight gain, which correlates directly to the time we started selling pringles and nutmix on the plane.

Yesterday I went to the doctor. They did a heart x-ray and an EKG. Scary stuff. I was nervous at the beginning of the appointment, but the Medical Assistant laughed like crazy when I told her the reason I gained all this weight was because I couldn’t resist the pringles and nut mix on the plane. I explained it’s like an alcoholic confronted with alcohol. She laughed, which made me laugh, and broke the fear in me.

However, when the doc told me my heart and lungs were fine, I did cry a little bit. I was more scared than I would admit. For some reason I am not afraid of death, but I am very afraid of disability. Life is hard enough, the last thing I wanted in my life was to have to "take it easy" and avoid things like running or fast biking.

So the verdict is the weight gain, not some cholestrol in the nuts/pringles is what is causing my breathing problems. So I need to lose weight.

I know what you are thinking "Please Athena, don’t lose any weight, you are already blindingly beautiful, if you lost any weight you would kill everyone in your path with your burning hotness." While this is true, I have to put my health first. I really have not been in the mood lately to go back to a steady diet of cheeseless sandwiches and salads with a tablespoon of dressing. But this breathing thing has really gotten on my nerves. Especially when I inhale loud enough for people to hear (it’s worse on the plane.)

So here is what the doctor gave me clearance to do...to try Alli. Have you heard of Alli? I am not trying it in order to "lose 50% more weight" I am trying it as a behavioral modifier. If I eat pringles or nutmix while taking Alli. I will get "sick" like a gastric bypass, but one that I can stop. It sounds funny that a person would go to such extremes, but I am serious when I say that I can’t resist the chips & nuts. I don’t keep junkfood in the house for the same reason. I just cant say no.

So wish me luck! I have lost weight before, so I know what I am doing. And THANK GOD I have no heart or lung problems standing in my way :)