I slept horribly last night. I tossed and turned, and every time I woke up I checked if P wrote me to apologize. Of course he never will, not because he isnt sorry, but because he is spineless and married to a selfish manipulator. I am letting myself get down about someone who I knew very little about, for a very short time.
So I am going to write the e-mail to myself, to get some closure.
Dear Diana,
My wife doesn't know I am writing this, she feels hurt and I dont want to make her feel worse.
I really did have fun the other night, I really enjoy your company and think you are stunningly beautiful. (now readers, don't think this is arrogant to include in my imaginary e-mail- he kept telling me this!) But things still felt wrong to me. My relationship with my wife is very important to me, and it has been difficult trying to figure out how to best address her bisexuality. I am sorry you got caught in the middle of it.
I know you dont have low moral standards, and I think my wife was just reacting emotionally when she said that. She was hurt that you didn't want to meet her, and felt you were trying to take advantage of me by bringing alcohol. I kept telling you I dont drink often, I thought you would take the hint and not offer any more when you were having it.
I am sorry I dont want to continue our friendship, it would just be too complicated.
P
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